Sunday, June 26, 2005

Mebbe its really the hormones..
I'm feeling kinda shitty today
I had my rest...but ended feeling restless
I wanted to sleep...but cant get to sleep
I juz feel weird
Neither here nor there..
It felt like as if
I've given my best
But its actually not the best after all
If I could do it
There is always someone who could do better

Tried to keep myself occupied
Ironing the clothes
Tidy up Syafiq's cupboard
Clean up kitchen
Ended up feeling more irritated than ever

There is sumthing that I'm not satisfied with
Could it be with myself?
Sigh..

nuthin else matters... @ 11:50 PM ::

Saturday, June 25, 2005

My weekends are always packed with some activities
In one way or another
Eversince having my own family
This week seems werst than any other
As I have birthday party, weddings and family day to attend

Today, all of us went to the zoo for a family day
They have done it at the zoo a few times b4...
And today we are back in here again
Typical of any family day
Games, sourvenirs, foods, entertainments
Shows, treasure hunts and lucky draws..
Except this time round..
We were sabo-ed to go on stage
To do some game
Arghh!
Its..so embarassing...

Finally reached home in the evening...
My whole lower bottom is aching like mad
Its the kind that wouldn't stop bothering u
Even though u tried to lay still
Together with my over-eating today
I am having a tight tummy
And wat felt like a tint of heartburn
Oh no..
Its back!
I guess I'm gonna have an early night tonite
Another action-packed day to go through tomorrow...


Us on stage

More pictures here

nuthin else matters... @ 9:37 PM ::

Friday, June 24, 2005

Its Hazim and Haris's Birthday today
Happy birthday boys...
May always be in good health and wealth :)

My cousin Ayu, decided to throw a mini party for them
At Costa Sands chalet
Its juz a small gathering among us
It still fun nonetheless

Together with my boys
We all went swimming today
Kinda funny swimming with a tummy
Never tried that before

And of course..
After all that energy wasted
We were famished when we got back to the chalet
Not to be disappoited...
As loads of delicious food awaits us


The 4 boys getting ready to go swimming


Ayu doing the bbq

nuthin else matters... @ 9:23 PM ::

Monday, June 20, 2005

I'm down with flu again...
This is the 2nd time
Me being sick during this pregnancy
I couldn't get sick easily then
Hence, my previous pregnancies were relatively flu-free

Tuitions are ok
Students r still in holiday mood
With a tint of panic
Too much school homeworks..yet to finish
And so little time
Heheh
Tu la..buat last minute lagi eheh

Other than that..
Life's pretty much the same
Me bz with my boys at home...
Spending time with hubby and in=laws over the weekends...

nuthin else matters... @ 10:43 PM ::

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

I would like to express thanks to all the encouraging words that has been offered
Reassured that I'm really ok
I dun understand why my expression of thoughts triggered some unsatisfaction among some
For I am only human...
With curious mind n feelings...


To them,
Thank you for bringing me up the best you can,
See me thru university and marriage...
We are after all a family.

To her,
Thank you for letting me lived
And give me a chance to have a better life.

The End

nuthin else matters... @ 11:39 PM ::

Monday, June 13, 2005

For the past few days
I have started gathering information abt myself
Kinda interesting learning abt urself all over again
I do feel a bit sad at times
Knowing that everybody knows except me
I'm like in a Truman Show
Wher everything is made up
Sometimes I really dunno wat to believe anymore
I cant even trust my birth cert
Sigh...watever it is
This is the life that is chosen for me
If I have never complain abt it b4
Mebbe I shouldn't even start

nuthin else matters... @ 11:15 PM ::

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Peace of mind granted
The puzzles all fit now

Seek it
And you shall find it

nuthin else matters... @ 10:09 PM ::

Friday, June 10, 2005

I'm coming 27 this year
Somehow, for as long as I live
I've been bothered by this little fact abt myself
That I can never escape from
It is like some chronic disease
That stay dormant in your body
Waiting for the time to have a relapse
I can b well for weeks, or months...
Or years...

But everytime when ther is a 'relapse'
I juz can't face the truth
Is it really true?
Can I run as fast as I can from it?
Till the end of the world?
No
Coz its in the genes
All humans are born with a mouth are bound to talk
Throughout my life
As long as I breathe

Yesterday, I can't sleep
Watever they say make senses
And me like a super sleuth
Sans the magnifying glass
Did some research
Digging my albums boxes
I finally fall asleep at 5am
Without having any answer to my endless list of questions
Feeling half-hearted
Or should I say not knowing wat to feel at all

A quote from freon

"It's very unlike me to simply let my troubles eat me up. Somehow this time I just can't push it away.. no matter how much I wanna put it aside at times. Yet the harder I try to surpress the thought, the tougher it is to simply get rid of it.. it just lingers around. hmm..."

That is exactly how I'm feeling right now. Period.

nuthin else matters... @ 10:20 PM ::

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Life goes on as per normal
My pregnancy has been great
Gonna be 16 weeks already
Starting to feel like as if I'm not pregnant at all
Heheh..energy level has gone up
No more pregnancies complaintsfor the time being

Went out with the girls today
As always...it's never boring
How can it be when u r out shopping during the GSS period with ur girlfrens?

Starting to miss my tuition kids
Missing the heartpain mebbe...haha
But definitely enjoying my lazing ard at home
I can wake up any time
I can go out any time
Shopping everyday
How I wish this will go on hehe

I'm starting tuitions back again next week
Not the full force yet
Juz a few
Juz enough to make enough $$$
For some bills and my GSS shopping

Oh btw, juz saw the madagascar show
Its hilarious
Syafiq loves it!

nuthin else matters... @ 11:03 PM ::